Peer Pressure

At a dinner party the other night, in between dinner and dessert, my friend Catherine provided entertainment:

Yes, that’s an accordion.  And after dessert her husband pulled out his banjo to discuss banjos with Kellaura who also plays the banjo and we ended up with a cocktail and dulce de leche ice cream sandwich fueled Rainbow Connection sing-a-long.

So here’s the point, a point other than that I just wanted to brag that I have a friend who can bust out the accordion Joan Harris style during a dinner party:  I have inspiring friends.  By some miraculous string of events, I’m friends with people who, just by being themselves, encourage creativity and make me want to read more books and fix the strings on my ukulele and start practicing.  And get back to the piano.  And teach myself to bind books.  And learn Spanish.  (That’s really more inspired by some of my best local friends, the garbage men.)  And swim a mile in 30 minutes.  (I made up that goal on the spot– I wonder how feasible that is?)

My sister, who is inspiring in not only in her hilariousness but also in her ability to be a tidy and organized individual, did speak some truth into my life the other day.  Her quote, after visiting for a week:

“I always wondered where you found so much time to read.  I see now it’s because you don’t put away laundry.”

Ouch, so true.  It’s a balance that I’m working on, creativity vs. clutter/cleanliness.  I’m using the term “working on” lightly because wasting time makes its way into that balance all too often.  So it’s back to my friends- if you have time to practice the accordion and take care of two beautiful children, surely you’re not wasting very much time.  I’m inspired again.

Baby steps to no more time wasting- starting with putting away laundry right now-

Redemption

At some point in my adult life I conceded that the best summers of my life were behind me.  I would never consider high school my glory days and I really try to embrace every new stage of life fully, but summer did seem to be reserved for the young, specifically because when you’re young you actually get to quit working for a few months.  As an adult, a week of vacation is weak competition when compared the summers of my youth, swimming at the Y every day chased with a big stack of Baby Sitter’s Club books, and and as I got older, crammed with vacation and camp sessions and mission trips and 50-cent Tuesdays at the movie theater.  In contrast, my adult summers allowed me to wear long sleeves if I felt like it because I was working in an office with no windows.  Then I was alternately first trimester pregnant and constantly nauseous or sweaty and covered in milk.  Don’t get me wrong, those summers had their moments, especially the utter joy of new life.  But that’s not a feeling exclusive to a season and the days of carrying a backpack with my bathing suit in it everywhere I went, just in case, were gone without a suitable replacement.  I embraced beach weekends and popsicles, but overall cut my losses, adopted fall as my new favorite season, and moved on. 

But now- summer, glorious summer!- is back.

So far, every day of the summer has been like meeting an old friend.  The summer feeling that I thought was lost forever is back.  We’re going to the pool every day. Afternoons are spent watching cartoons and eating popcorn. To take a shower, we have to push aside all the drying bathing suits, and bathing habits are in lax summer mode too. If you go to the pool on Thursday afternoon and plan on going back Friday morning, what’s the point of a bath in between?  That’s just more time to play and read books after dinner.  Some days I get up in the morning and get dressed in my bathing suit.  I’ve used a hair dryer maybe three times since May.  It’s not just the swimming, it’s the details, like eating strawberries with dinner.  I didn’t know I would ever feel this way again and I like it.  

How Not to Pickle Something for the First Time

1.  Start on a whim in the midst of cooking an actual dinner.

2.  Select vegetables that have been in the fridge for at least a week and are on their last day of being edible.  Use vegetables not called for in the recipe. 

3.  Use a recipe from Martha Stewart Living that makes 4 quarts, but estimate the calculations in your head so you can convert the quantity to one mason jar.  Don’t measure precisely, especially with vinegar or sugar.

4.  Don’t have most of the ingredients on hand so you can substitute at least half of them, specifically the main ingredients.  Be sure to leave one or two ingredients out as well.

5.  Boil vinegar, guaranteeing that anyone who smells it will ever eat anything it touches.

6.  After 24 hours in the fridge, set the open jar on the kitchen table during dinner so that everyone can admire the hip jar and ignore the super vinegary old vegetables.

7.  Leave the jar in the fridge indefinitely because you’re unsure of how to dispose of its contents.

Mini Spooners Attack

In the grand spectrum of breakfast, I put biscuits and gravy and fruit salad and poppy seed bagels with chive cream cheese and migas and really hot coffee and mimosas on the I’d Hit That side and cereal on the ~Meh side.  But for Trent, Mini Spooners (also known as Frosted Mini Wheats, but in a bag) are The Best.  Rush and Tate like them too so I’ll occasionally purchase them.  We don’t have them all the time, because Trent will eat his entire caloric intake for the day in the form of one gigantic bowl of cereal.  And  now we have another reason to not buy them all the time.

Rush and Tate generally eat them dry, just picking them up and munching away.  They recently realized that if they chew them a little bit-

they can blow through their mouths-

and shoot tiny pieces of shredded wheat all over each other-

and everywhere.

They think it’s hilarious.  It is hilarious, in a we’re-never-going-to get-this-cleaned-up way.

For now, we can rinse out hair in the pool.  It might be a good idea to make Mini Spooners a summer only treat.

It’s the New Jan Brady

Rush and Tate are both generally anxious about the water.  They tend to cry every time I try to get them into the big pool in our neighborhood, which so far has been every day this summer.  (Hurray for summer at the pool!)   Tate will immediately climb out of the baby pool and spend his time playing on the chairs.  Rush spent all last summer doing the same thing and is noticeably more comfortable this summer, a fact I am largely crediting to swimming lessons, which he is in the midst of.   He’s loving the baby pool, but not willing to do much in the big pool with us.  As for swimming lessons, Rush was fine after the first day, but on the first day there was a lot of crying and not wanting to get out of the car and not wanting to get into the water.  Thankfully the parents are not allowed into the pool area and watch lessons behind police interrogation glass mirror windows so the kids are forced to jump right in, literally and figuratively.  The instructors are obviously experienced with scared kids and Rush is doing great at his lessons.  He was fine after that first morning. 

It’s been an emotional experience for me, because I look at Rush and feel the exact same apprehension he felt that first day.  It’s the burden that the oldest child carries, having to be the test subject for every new experience.  Just from one week of going with Rush, Tate is already familiar with the facilities and the process of swimming lessons.  Rush was so nervous the first day because he didn’t know what to expect.  I was holding back tears all morning, and the night before, of course.  Quality nervousness always includes the night before.

I mentioned my nervousness to my –younger- sister Casey the day before his first lesson and talked about the how that was the worst feeling as the oldest child.  Casey, who never hesitated to emphasize the downside of “always” getting bossed around as the second child, actually admitted that she always recognized the advantage of having a someone test out life experiences for her.  When she started college she not only had a built in best friend in the form of moi on campus, she had also spent a weekend with me and spent the nights in my dorm room and she knew that I was doing fine.  The whole summer before I went to college, I just keeping thinking, we don’t even know if my parents had the ability to raise a person to survive on her own.  I was the test subject, as always.  Now as a parent, it’s not comforting to know that parents have no idea the first time either.  I was a basket case over what to pack for Rush’s lunch when he started mother’s day out.  With Tate, that’s a ridiculous fear.

But what’s made me cry a little bit every day during swimming lessons is seeing that I’ve passed along my gene of being nervous about new things to Rush.  I see him give his teacher a look that says “you’re crazy for asking me to do something crazy” before he’s expected to put his face under water.  I recognize that look because I gave it to gymnastics teachers, track coaches, camp counselors…Why did I have to pass along a gene like that?  Why can’t my children be made of an invincible mix of only the very best Trent and Kelly qualities? 

What’s going to get Rush through life is that as the oldest you have to just fight through it.  You stick a power ballad in your head (I like Here I Go Again by Whitesnake) and go, because what’s your other option?  Not learning to swim?  Not ever starting high school?

I’m thinking about this today because this afternoon I joined a gym.  Of course I was unnecessarily nervous on the way to check it out.  I find decisions are often best made when you don’t think about them too much and just handle the consequences later, like finding a sick kitten on the beach and putting him in your car, so I went ahead and joined while I was there.  What amazed me the most on the way there was thinking about Trent, who never feels even slightly nervous about new things.  The man starts a new job like he owns the place, never even considering paralyzing details like where to park or who to eat lunch with.  I never even knew that kind of attitude was an option in life. 

So I’m hoping that with Trent’s influence I can shake my old ways and face every brand new situation with unfailing confidence.  Sounds totally doable right…?  I’ve got to go blindly into new things with Rush anyway, so I might as well try to be Trent-like in the process.  For the first time ever I have a gym membership tag on my keychain, so why not? 

Good Old Fashioned Family Road Trip

Years ago I tried to convince a co-worker to drive his family to Florida instead of flying.  I repeatedly told him it was the best drive, so much to do, really entertaining!  Within a year of that conversation, Trent and I drove to Florida ourselves and I realized that it’s the worst drive, endless stretches of pine trees on I-10.  There are barely any towns to drive through, barely anything scenic on the interstate, and the only thing to look at is the signs announcing lodging or food at a specific exit. 

How, when I had driven to Florida almost every year of my childhood and teenage years, had I never realized this?  It took me about five minutes to recognize that my parents made the trip bearable.  My dad was willing to stop for ice cream or snacks constantly and my mom always prepared enough goodies and activities to make the drive an exciting part of the trip.  She would wrap up a box for each of us with stickers, coloring books, a Wooly Willy.  We had prizes – like Smarties- for being the first person to spot a milestone like the Mississippi River bridge in Baton Rouge. 

So when plane tickets were $400 a person and the thought of lugging two car seats and a stroller through an airport seemed unbearable, it became a personal challenge to make Rush and Tate understand that driving on vacation is part of the adventure.  The 2012 ringer is that we intentionally do not have a DVD player in the van.  People get really opinionated about us not travelling with movies, panicking as if we were going to buckle them into the back seat and make them entertain our children.  I’m not exaggerating when I say that a lot of people had opinions about it; even my dental hygienist informed me that I needed to buy a personal DVD player for the trip.  People told us we were crazy and we would regret it.  At times before we left it made me a little nervous, but then I would remember that parents have been dragging their kids on long treks without movies since the dawn of transportation.  It’s doable, and surprisingly, can be fun. 

The drive to Disney World, and the drive home, was a success. I think stopping every two hours played a big part in that.  We’ve had more crying and stress on a short drive to the beach then we experienced in 2000 miles.  The ability of Trent or I to climb into the back seat would usually help stop any tears.  For some reason we became a novelty when we weren’t in the front seat.  Neither boy is a reliable napper in the car, so while most parents try to overlap a car trip with a time when the kids will be sleeping, we do the opposite, knowing that a car ride during a nap or at night will just mean that the boys are getting progressively more tired and cranky as they sit awake in the back seat.  And even though they didn’t sleep very much in the car, it still went well.  Miraculous.

I went to Dollar Tree before we left and spent $10 on what at Disney would have cost at least $100.  The glow necklaces were for the parade (credit to my sister Casey for this idea) but the rest was wrapped individually to be dolled out along the way.  My neighbors have two elementary school aged children and will often bring by a box of outgrown toys.  A few months ago she came by with a box of books, so I immediately hid away the ones I thought the boys would love the most, Winnie the Pooh, trains, fire trucks, some Golden Books, and wrapped those up for the drive too. 

They also both love keys, so my mom, who has a collection of keys, made them each a keychain.  These were also wrapped for the drive. 

I had a scrap of Toy Story fabric just big enough to make two drawstring bags.  Filled with a package of cookies, the bag was the first surprise of the trip, received when we reached Louisiana.

Rush hoarded all his goodies in it throughout the trip.  He would get in the van and yell, “Where’s my purse?!”  We told him a few times that it was a bag, not a purse, but finally it was just call it whatever you want as long as you’re happy.

We packed a roll of painter’s tape and marked a line across the van, drawing our house at one end and Cinderella’s castle at the other.  I originally wanted to make a little van to move along and mark of state lines and cities as landmarks, but I forgot about the whole idea until about ten minutes before we left.  So instead we had a hastily cut-out W, but it served it’s purpose well.  Some things sound like a good idea but fizzle out in reality, but the painter’s tape was a hit. 

On the way there, we stopped exclusively at rest stops.  Florida has wonderfully maintained rest stops with clean bathrooms, picnic tables, and plenty of space to run.  It was much easier to make sandwiches on a picnic blanket than to try to keep the boys sitting at tables in a restaurant.  We also pulled out a soccer ball at most stops so they could really run around, but I think Trent and I got more energy out with the soccer ball then they did. We did get to indulge in a road trip guilty pleasure, eating at the Cracker Barrel.  I had my once every two years serving of chicken fried steak and the boys got to play with the giant checkers set.

Possibly the highlight of the drive for the Rush was the car game.  It was a basic concept, cars and trucks that they might see on the road drawn onto index cards.  We would pass back a card to each boy and while Tate would laugh and hold his for a minute before throwing it down, Rush would watch until he found the car, then pass back the card for another one. 

One day I’ll be an old granny, climbing into a futuristic minivan with my grandkids, clinging to my grubby and beloved 2004 Rand McNally U.S. atlas.  Grown-up Rush or Tate or Baby Arne will roll his eyes and say, “Mom, we just press a button and we’ll be in Kissimmee in ten minutes” but I’ll follow along I-10 with my finger, gauging how long it will take to get from Pensacola to Tallahassee.  It’s not like we even need a map to get there now, 1-10, take I-12 to skip New Orleans, more I-10, south on I-75, then I know the Orlando area well enough to find hotels and restaurants and theme parks.  But I like looking at the map every few minutes to see our progress.  And it makes a good hiding place.

And a good drum as well.

I indulged in an iced caramel frappe from McDonalds every single day of our vacation, knowing that at home it would be back to Folgers decaf and our Mr. Coffee.  Rush took a sip and decided that he loved coffee, and it’s hard to explain that it’s not really coffee, but more of a milkshake that it’s acceptable to drink at 8 AM.  On a long road trip with minimal exciting scenery (excluding the Mobile tunnel), being able to enjoy the little splurges is essential.  It’s probably a good mindset, because next summer we’ll be a family who requires four full priced airline tickets.  It looks like we’re committed to driving for vacation into the foreseeable future.

Disney ‘12

Here’s the deal:  I love Disney World.  It never gets old for me. 

Vacation was everything I dreamed it would be and more.  I can’t emphasize it enough – Rush and Tate were super travellers. We get to the parks when they open in the morning, no hanging around the hotel room or leisurely breakfasts. We stayed in a great Kissimmee hotel again this year, close to a grocery store and next door to a McDonalds, so it was breakfast in the room or on the way to the parks. McDonalds is the scapegoat of the fast food industry, but it’s the only fast food restaurant that I can think of where we could get yogurt and fruit and oatmeal for breakfast and feed the entire family for less than $10. If we’re going to be eating hamburgers and fries for lunch, it’s helpful to not have to start with a sausage biscuit.

My dad trained me in a Disney vacation style involving two main components:  1. On your trip, go all out. The trip starts when you leave your house and ends when you get to your front door, even travel time is part of the trip. Get up early, stay up late, and no resting.  It’s about having fun with your family.  2.  Choose what’s important to you in a vacation and spend your money on that.  We camped in a tent in Fort Wilderness when I was young but we always had ice cream. 

The worst Disney vacation advice I’ve ever seen is to go back to your room in the afternoon for a quick rest time, then head back to the park in the evening. Crazy! Disney World is no place for rest!

I think the Magic Kingdom was slightly overwhelming to both Rush and Tate.  Rush loved the castle, the trams, riding the train, the carousel.  Tate loved the Enchanted Tiki Room and Minnie Mouse.

Early on during our Magic Kingdom day, I realized we were screwed if we lost Tate’s pacifier.

We came home with a thousand pictures of the boys sharing a Sprite.  At those moments they were contained and focused and we had a few seconds to pull out the camera.

I was so excited about the return of the Main Street Electrical Parade.  We grabbed dinner and staked out a prime spot on Main Street while we waited for the parade to start.  Sitting down two hours before the parade not only guarantees a great view of the parade, but also provides wind down time and people watching. 

Did you know that a 20 oz Sprite has more sugar than half a bag of cotton candy?  We had both that day.  That’s a vacation splurge.

Tate waited until after the parade to sleep, Rush made it through the fireworks.

If it’s going to rain, the best place to be is Animal Kingdom.  I mean, it rains every afternoon in Florida during the summer, but if it’s going to really rain, all day, I’m heading to Animal Kingdom.

I won’t say that every single moment of the trip was one hundred percent perfect.  On previous trips I’ve witnessed seen crying kids and parents who are grouchy because they put all this effort into the perfect vacation, but it’s hot and crowded and the kids are crying for no reason other than being tired and overwhelmed and full of candy.  This was the first time I actually got to live out some of those choice vacation moments.  But who can even remember the details?  The good moments overshadow the trying.

Trent and I hadn’t been to Hollywood Studios since 2003.  We weren’t even planning on going this trip, but we were swayed by the Toy Story ride (which we didn’t even make it onto) and the parade.  The parade was worth it.

And of course it was time for a visit to Pizza Planet

There’s a really fabulous playground at Hollywood, themed as…wait for it…can you guess this movie?

Honey I Shrunk the Kids – maybe it’s time to update the name of that area?  I enjoy watching that movie repeatedly, twenty-five years ago, but it’s not really a timeless classic.  The playground was pretty fun though and we spent a lot of time among the giant Super Soaker and blades of grass.

One of my very favorite places in the entire world is Typhoon Lagoon.  We spent a lot of time floating along the lazy river and I really couldn’t think of any more perfect way to spend a vacation.

There’s a real thing –yes naysayers, it’s real- that my dad invented and I subscribe to called Getting Your Feet Ready for the Waterslide.  It’s a rite of spring and pre-vacation summer that includes making sure you walk barefoot on hot asphalt or similar surfaces to prepare for walking around barefoot on boiling concrete all day at a waterpark.  I was ready.

Rush and Tate were laughing and playing in the water one minute, made it to the parking lot, then proceeded to immediately fall asleep in the car, Tate before we even left the parking lot.

The trip was everything a vacation should be.  Is it too soon to start planning another trip…?