Lightbulb

Another thing about Christmas gifts:  My younger brother was always one of the most difficult person to shop for, until last year when he became the easiest.

Last Christmas he called on December 23 to tell me he did in fact plan on coming to our house for Christmas, which was wonderful news.  It also meant that I wanted to scrounge up a few more presents for him to open so he wouldn't be sitting around all morning with one gift while the rest of us enjoyed the "ecstasy of unbridled avarice".  My first thought was that I wasn't leaving the house and I wasn't spending any money on him.  Breakthrough!  I had finally realized I needed to stop shopping for the fun uncle and see him in his true gift receiving form:  Pop, circa 1995, an eighty year old man who is careful with money and likes to work in the yard.

We all know Hunter will spend Christmas morning as any Texas grandfather would, standing around drinking coffee and periodically walking outside with his dog, always ready to pull a pocket knife  out of his pocket to aid the removal of tape from a gift.  He's the person who would also spend the rest of the day making gumbo with our dad.  Not gumbo for Christmas dinner- gumbo for, you know, the future.  Because Christmas day for grandfathers means making gumbo or napping sitting up in an arm chair.

 I already had for Hunter what I consider to be one of the top ten best gifts I've ever given, a small oak tree grown from an acorn in our yard, which had been growing for about 2 years.  To adding to that, I wrapped up all the ingredients and seasoning to make red beans and rice, along with the recipe, and a case of beer.  It was the equivalent of buying Pop cans of peanuts or a rubber snake to twine through the fence in his garden.

Now that I've cracked the code on Hunter, I'm doing my best to work on everyone else.  Because gift giving isn't about giving something to the person you think you know, it's about knowing who the person really is.  My brother, the 30-year-old 80-year-old man.

Almost Willed Into Existence

Kyle is my (imaginary) personal assistant.  He's 20, with dark, asymmetrical hair and always wears skinny jeans, plaid shirts, and one of those across the shoulder satchels.  Gay, of course, because no one wants it to get awkward when it turns out that I'm easy to fall in love with, with my addiction to dry shampoo and all.

Every morning, Kyle comes over right about the time that Trent is leaving for work.  He wakes me up with a cup of coffee that he made when he arrived and gets right in my face and says, "Good morning, Mrs. Williams.  It's going to be a great day."  Kyle always smells like Winterfresh gum, hair gel, and super expensive cologne.  I keep telling him that we don't pay him enough to spend that much on cologne, but he doesn't care.  I always say, "Call me Kelly" and he goes, "Okay, Kel."  Because I love when people call me Kel!

Tejano music is already turned on in the bathroom so I can get ready in peace, then Kyle comes in to let me know the dishwasher is unloaded and brief me on the day's news, including pop culture.  Then I go about my day as usual, waking up kids and making breakfast, because Kyle's not a nanny or a maid; he's a personal assistant.  He sits on a tall stool with a twisty seat, perched in the corner of the kitchen until he's needed.  He keeps his ear buds in and messes about on his phone until I say something like, "Hey Kyle, last night I heard one of the cats throw up a hairball right before I fell asleep.  Can you please find that and clean it up?"  And he's already on it.

Kyle's not bad with kids, but he's not great with them either.  He mainly just gives blank looks or waves from his stool.  The kids regard him as a lovable weirdo.  He's not here to help the kids; he's here to help me.

He's really helpful when we're trying to get out the door for school.  I might realize that we forgot about Tate's Pre-K homework, so we'll be frantically working on that when I realize that I haven't packed Holly's backpack.  So I'll yell, "Kyle, grab and handful of diapers and write Holly's name on them!  NO, NOT FOUR!  A HANDFUL!  TEN DIAPERS!  HURRY SCHOOL STARTS IN THREE MINUTES!!!!!  DAMMIT KYLE GO!!!!!"  We all love Kyle because he takes the brunt of my frustration yelling.

I'm still going about all my regular business, but Kyle is making it possible for me to do that by doing all the things for me that are a huge hassle, like checking email.  After I drop the kids at school, he's right beside me walking to the car with his phone out as we go through my correspondence.  Then he goes to facebook for me and "likes" all my friends' posts while unfriending anyone who says that Jesus told us to use semi-automatic weapons.  He rolls his eyes while doing that; we both do.

Kyle also excels at special projects.  Like he finds a bunch of great babysitters, does preliminary interviews with them, then gathers them in a room for my approval.  He's mostly free to go do his own thing during the day and not hang around, but he'll run an errand to the pharmacy if necessary.  He always handles returns and exchanges.  He's back every day by 3:15 for homework.  Then I hand him a crisp $1000 bill, because he's worth it, and say, "See you tomorrow at 6:15!"  Kyle high fives all the kids, then he's out.

Kyle never says anything bad about me to his friends.  One of his buddies might say, "Ugh, how was Kelly today? Yelling up a storm?"  And Kyle just says, "Don't you ever speak ill of her, She's doing her best and she's probably the best mother in the whole entire world."

All I want for Christmas- is Kyle.

Christmas Dress

Last Wednesday, 10 PM:  This is a true Advent moment.  I'm preparing for the birth of Christ by making something special, a Christmas dress for my daughter, because it's a special day!  I'm using the hands and mind that God gave me!

Last Thursday, 1 PM:  Every button that I want to buy makes the dress hand wash only.  I HATE SEWING.

Last Thursday, 1:20 PM:  Oh, I could probably hand wash this dress.

Today, 8:00 AM:  Let's get the house clean!

Today, 11:15 AM:  House is a lost cause.  Must work on something with tangible outcome.

Today, 1:00 PM:  I didn't cut out the very first pattern piece needed to start sewing and where are all the pattern pieces?  Lost!  Did I throw accidentally throw them out...?  Why did I think I could do this OR ANYTHING???

Today, 1:10 PM:  Daniel Tiger's voice starts singing and singing in my head.  "If something seems impossible, try a little bit at a time.  If something seems impossible, try a little bit at a time.  If something seems impossible, try a little bit at a time."  (Daniel Tiger repeats things A MILLION TIMES.  It's insufferable, yet effective.)

Today, 1:25 PM:  Mary Berry's voice replaces Daniel Tiger.  "If you choose to do something simple, it must be done perfectly."  Really, really wishing I had chosen the gauzy fabric with glittery holly all over it.

Today, 2:25 PM:  Daniel Tiger is back.  "Just keep trying, you'll get be-eh-ter."

And Heaven and Nature Sing

Most anti-consumerism gift guides can be summed up in two words:  Experiences.  Charities.  That's great, but ignores how fun it really is to spend all morning opening presents around the tree you parked in your living room and covered in lights.  There are so many other options that take thought, time, creativity and might actually let heaven and nature sing.  Therefore:

Joy to the World:  12 Ideas for Alternative Gift Giving

1.  Plants.  If anyone gave me a plant in a pot from their yard, like took a clipping from their bougainvillea or plumeria and established it in a pot for me, I would love it.  NASA says you should have like at least ten houseplants to clean the benzene out of the air.  You can buy a bouquet of flowers at the grocery store for $20 or a giant houseplant for $10, any day of the year.

2.  Change Jars.  My brother has a really great godfather who always sent him Christmas and birthday gifts and always included a little something for my sister and I.  The gifts from Jess Davis were the only things we could open on Christmas Eve.  One year, he sent us each a jelly jar jammed full of loose change.  I think he just kept the jars on his counter and emptied his pockets all year, then gave them to us.  Great for kids.  Win.

3.  Booze.  One year we had a more extended group of family and people to share Christmas morning with, and there were festive wine bags lined up and down the windowsill next to the tree.  None of that went to waste.

4.  Food.  Now is the time for creativity.  Nick and Kellaura once gave us a bottle of homemade Irish Cream.  (See above.)  My sister-in-law once shared a homemade cheese ball that a friend gave her with a box of crackers.  My sister gives caramel corn and refuses to give out the recipe because it is time consuming and messy to make.  She says part of the gift is that she will physically make it for you and let you skip the messy parts.  No one has ever turned down homemade bread.

5.  Family Cookbook.  One year my sister-in-law made a cookbook for me.  Some recipes were new ones she found online and thought I would like, some were family recipes.  All the family recipes were classic Williams recipes, ones that I would expect to eat on a holiday or had enjoyed sometime in the past.  It's of the nature that if I think about making something and I would normally contact Trent's mom for the recipe, I usually check the cookbook first and I already have it.

6.  Mix Tapes.  Oh my God, I wish.  If I had the means and the wherewithal, I would slip mix tapes in everyone's stockings.

7.  Musical Instruments.  I just learned that guitars are priced relatively reasonably.  I'm pretty sure you can get a guitar for less than any electronic available today.  Who knew?  Ukuleles, harmonicas, classic things that will last a lifetime and make you the life of the party.  If you are double awesome:  Xylophone.  Auto harp.  Accordion.  Bagpipe.

8.  Pets from a Shelter.  Giving someone a live animal is a bad idea- or is it?  If we were getting a dog at our house, I would make it a Christmas surprise.  Merry Christmas!  It's Rogelio and Fritz, my two imaginary future dogs!  This works because it's so much better to get a pet when you haven't thought through all the consequences.  And if you're getting one dog or cat, why not get two?  It's good for all parties involved, people and pets.  Probably only good for immediate family and must be approved by the woman in charge.

9.  Experiences.  It has to be on the list, because it is the most genius gift.  Especially if you plan to do something with the person, because then the gift also says, "I enjoy spending time with you!"  Upside to this:  Better for the environment than a toy that won't last.  Downside:  EXPENSIVE.  The world where I can give everyone an experience is a world where my Christmas budget does not matter.

10.  Charitable Giving.  I think the trick to this is to still give something to the person to unwrap, but without spending more than a few dollars on the thing to unwrap.  A few years ago we started making a donation for Trent's brother's family instead of trying to guess what 4 teenagers would enjoy opening.  We always try to make it creative, so for example this year STOP READING NOW IF YOU ARE TROY OR JULEE.

We made a donation to a health clinic and gave them prescription jars filled with Skittles.  It's wrapped in a Walgreens bag.

11.  Re-gifts.  Sometimes people have things in their homes that you love.  Or you have things in your home that you know they love.  What if you gave it to them?  My aunt decided she didn't want to wait until she died (she's not even close to old) to split up her jewelry, so half the time when I see her she slips a ring on my finger or a bracelet on my arm.  Or sneaks me a purse.  There are black and white family pictures sitting in closets all over the country that could be framed and given.  There are grandmother's quilts in closets and sentimental dishes and tools.  The best gift might actually have been purchased or made years ago and it just waiting to be given new life.

12.  Book of the Month Club.  Last  year I collected 12 used books and wrapped them in brown paper, each with a month written down the side and a clue about the contents on the front.  Then I wrapped all of that in a big cardboard box and gave it to my sister for Christmas.  It captured everything that the truest and best form of material gift giving can be.  It was inexpensive, insanely fun to put together, insanely fun to give.  I was giddy about giving it to her.  I KNEW she would love, and she did.  And it kept on giving all year long.  What other Thing of the Month Clubs could there be...?

Speak Ye Peace

Some people are get the tree up before Thanksgiving and start The Holidays with a bang.  Some people, like my sister, wrap up Thanksgiving then immediately get the tree and lights up, ready to greet the First Sunday of Advent with all the excitement it deserves.  My preference is to keep wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving until I get to sing, "Lo!  He comes with clouds descending" and make an Advent wreath.  Then the preparations and anticipation builds slowly, one day at a time.  Like yesterday we unpacked the creche and I kragled on the donkey's ears and one of the wise men's head.  Good progress. 

It appears that Advent may be my very favorite church season.  I mean, Easter of course, but Advent!
"Comfort, comfort ye my people, speak ye peace thus saith our God; comfort those who sit in darkness mourning 'neath their sorrows' load.  Speak ye to Jerusalem of the peace that waits for them; tell her that her sine I cover and her warfare now is over."

A "Welcome Advent" paragraph in the church bulletin on Sunday included the sentence, "Be intentional."  Okay.  Let's do it.

Thanksgiving: Never Forget

Poor ol' Thanksgiving always gets lost in the mix of Santa paraphernalia.  I'm still thankful for:

School programs, music teachers, and lost front teeth making room for the new ones-

Our children, their friends, and the previous owners of our backyard play fort for playing outside so often, so hard, so enthusiastically, and so well that they completely wore it out-

A husband who is more than happy to team up with me to take it apart-

  

And get to work building a tree house-

Parades - ALWAYS FOR PARADES

The seriousness of make believe-

A chance to see every last one of our siblings, parents, and all related nieces/nephews/cousins over the course of three days-

And for fresh water and washing machines, because those kids definitely got in the surf in their clothes.

Allegro

When I was in third grade, all I wanted to do was take piano lessons.  My mom would ask what I wanted to do, soccer, gymnastics, whatever else kids sign up for, and all I begged for was to take piano lessons.  The glitch was that our family didn't have a piano.  It's not like buying a karate uniform or a basketball goal, but my parents started watching the classifieds.  I'm so grateful that they did that- how much easier would it have been to stop at "We don't have a piano!"?  Eventually they found a beautiful upright piano for sale at a small church.  I remember watching the piano get maneuvered out of the bed of a pick-up truck in our driveway.

I took piano lessons from fourth grade through high school.  Like anything, there are varying levels of intensity to piano lessons, from the concert pianist track to scheduling back to back lessons with your friend Kathleen so you can tell your piano teacher all about homecoming in between lessons.  My friend Kathleen did have the same piano teacher as I did, so guess which track I took.  

By a wonderful twist of perseverance and fate, I far outlasted my siblings in piano playing, each of them only lasting a few months or a year at most.  So when Trent and I moved into our house seven years ago, my parents gave us the piano.  The piano had never been tuned in all the years it sat at my parents house (I was the only one playing and they had already purchased a piano- how much more can you expect?) and after a trip down I-10 in the back of Brad and Dad Piano Movers's van, it sat largely unplayed still.  At that point it was vastly out of tune.  I kept meaning to call a piano tuner but we also kept having new kids arriving in our family.

But a few months ago I got a name of a piano tuner from a friend and called.  Was it even possible to tune an -almost- hundred year old piano that hadn't been tuned in at least 25 years?  He said he would look at it.  And he did.  He was a dream come true, spending almost twenty hours at our house doing repairs, replacing a broken key and a broken string, tightening things up and vacuuming out dust.  Through all the repairs, he warned us that there was a moderate possibility that the strings would just start snapping when he started tuning and he wouldn't be able to continue. 

I prayed that the strings wouldn't break, that the piano could be tuned.  And it was!  It is!  Just in time for piano lessons to start all over again, with Rush.   

What a pleasant surprise to remember that I can play the piano!  When my mom visited recently I pulled her into the room to demonstrate a sonata I once learned for a piano recital.  She remembered it and immediately had some kind of horrific flashback and left the room, implying that suffering through your children learning an instrument is possibly not one of the highlights of motherhood.  Hopefully knowing that all the money spent on lessons wasn't wasted outweighs the flashback.

I've been practicing everyday.  Practicing is equally encouraging and discouraging- I can see improvement, but also realize how many hours one would really have to devote to be flawless. The kids cry and yell, "not the piano!" and I just ignore them.  I looked up tips for memorizing music, and many people recommended practicing with distractions to make your brain go into a super focus mode.  Plus there's no set-up or take down, just walk into the room and sit down.  Finally, I've found a very compatible hobby to my line of work!

It's a new day in the Williams house, a new day!

Every Day in the Life

I found all these pictures on my phone, compliments of Tate, photojournalist.

  

There are Nike shirts that say:  365 EVERY DAMN DAY.  I'm going to get one.  But clearly not for sports or working out or whatever else Nike represents.

Little House, Again

There's a scene in the Little House books where someone gives the Ingalls family some chicks.  And Ma says something like, "We'll feed the chicks and they'll grow.  And after a year we'll have eggs.  Then after two years we'll have more chickens and more eggs.  And then in three years we can eat one of the chickens.  So in three years we'll have fried chicken, girls!"  Or maybe it was when they finally plant the garden (At Plum Creek?  Or on the prairie?) and they spend all year in joyful anticipation of finally getting to eat lettuce and onions.  Then they move.

Three years ago we planted a satsuma tree.  Last spring we had dozens of blossoms and tiny pea sized satsumas started to grow.  Then it was super windy and all were blown off the tree except for twelve satsumas.  And almost every time I've walked by that little tree all year long, I've counted those twelve satsumas to make sure they were still there.  And now, we're eating them.  And next year, God willing, the tree will grow.  And one year we'll eat satsumas and make satsuma cakes and send friends home with bags full of orange fruit.

Thankfully we've been able to purchase a variety of citrus fruits from the grocery store over the past few years, including right now.

Holly has a black eye from that villainous foe, the edge of the kitchen table.  She is modeling one of the dresses from her fall collection.  It was the same pattern that I used for the very first dress I made for her (which she never wore because it was oddly shaped) but this time the pattern was size XL.

CHOMP

"I'm so tired I could barf."  And yet...

The alligator was just to relax.  My mom is always finding driftwood and turning it into alligators; I think I inherited the alligator gene.

I have also started a new super secret project that I'm enjoying so far.  It's going to be a lot of sewing by hand, which will be good for squeezing into little bits of time. 

Everything I do ends up with a pile like that- in a good way.

35: Halfway to 70!

Fashion Update

It's great that I store boots and fleece and a pea coat all year long.   Because it's fall, I tried to wear boots yesterday, and I couldn't even make it through the whole day.  TOO HOT.  In other news, there are still bananas growing in our backyard.

Sunday after church I kicked off my heels under the kitchen table.  Monday night I put them on just to walk them upstairs to the closet.  Trent was like, "You look so nice!  You should dress like that every day!"  What I should be wearing every day is an apron and a head scarf.  

Maybe he can wear fancy shoes when he starts working on this situation:

No Rain

First things first:  Happy All Saints Day.  "They were all of them saints of God, and I mean, God helping, to be one too."

Remember yesterday?  Halloween.

Trunk or Treat was moved inside, but we can have a good time in an elementary filled with hundreds of kids and buckets of candy. 

Spending time with Tate while making his bat costume was one of the best parts of October.

There was no rain on Halloween.  

No wait, there was.  It rained almost all day, but stopped just in time to go trick or treating.  Then it rained again, on us, but we persevered and beat our previous distance record for trick or treating in our neighborhood.  Rush used the rainy afternoon to create a completely new costume for himself, ditching his vampire clothes to become Martin Kratt of the Wild Kratts.

It's hard not to love Halloween when people are dressed up and block partying and wandering the streets in the dark as it is actively raining.  The kids' shoes and socks were soaking wet, but hey, FREE CANDY!

I Got a Full 40 Minutes

I think if Holly wasn't the youngest we would have remembered to dress her in cute Halloween attire and snap a hundred photos in the pumpkin patch.

So every article about health/wellness talks about getting a good 7-8 hour sleep at night.  Here's the real question:  Is there any adult getting a good, solid, uninterrupted night's sleep?  I can't think of anyone I know -kids or no kids, any age over 30- who says, yeah, I sleep great every night.  I'm starting a poll.  Unrealistic expectations have been set and it might be time to figure out what the real sleep situation is.

*update- It took about three seconds of research to realize that "segmented sleep" is a real, historical thing.  Maybe I'll read more about that in the middle of the night.

My One Regret in Life

If I ever get a tattoo, it's going to be cursive script down my left forearm that says, "Reminder:  Do Not Get a Dog."  Because so many people have dogs that sometimes it seems like a good idea, like when we go to Blessing of the Pets without any pets with us.  But whenever I have a kitten with all their destruction and biting and energy, I remember that I do not need or want a dog.  Also, there's the problem of not being able to just dump out 40 servings of cat food and leave town.

But the suburbs can really be mind numbingly dull.   I guess we could go walk around Target...?  I could spend some time ripping out the zipper that I actually sewed through all four layers of a dress and lining, straight through the front...

Maybe we should get a dog, just to liven things up.  I don't really want a dog, I just need something to do besides dishes.  Something must be done.  So tonight, it's Humane Society or tattoo...Trent, let me know where you want to meet up.

Thinking Ahead

Sometimes I wonder what my career will be when I finally have to go back to work.  The problem remains that I reached my dream job -tour guide- when I was 21, and the salary was minimum wage.  In addition, at some age Tour Guide becomes Volunteer Docent, and the salary becomes zero.  I know I've hit that age.

People say, what would you do for free?  Figure that out then do it!  Okay, so raise my kids, living the dream!  Again, the salary is zero and we will one day have to pay for multiple college educations.

Something else I would do for free- decorate a car for Trunk or Treat.

So, does anyone pay for that?  Why can't I seem to want a job that comes with a salary?  Also, I don't want to have people telling me their theme and what they want their decorations to look like.  I just want to make what I want to make and then have people pay me for it.  So, artist?  In that case, beginning November 1, that monster sign is for sale for $500.

In reality, one day in the *hopefully distant* future, I'll be back to looking for a job and participating in the conversation where people ask me what I want to do.  No, you tell me what job you have available and I will learn to do it.  If I had something I really wanted to do, I would be putting all my energy into getting that job.  Wouldn't life be easier that way?  Thankfully, all this can wait for another day.

Retreat to Move Forward

Since Holly's first birthday, every week or so I say, "It's time to reenter society."  Really it took us until Holly was about a year and a half for me to reenter society.  And now I'm realizing I've spoken too soon.

I'm trying to keep up with people who don't have one-year-olds.  Reality:  I can't fly with the empty nesters.  And I can't keep up with people who have older kids, older like 5.  I don't have a lot of friends with really young kids, so I was just trying to keep up with my friends.  It's time to admit that's not happening.  Does everyone enjoy the challenge of unloading a dishwasher while someone grabs a coffee cup out and hurls it across the kitchen onto the tile?  In trying to reenter society, I forgot that one-year-olds turn into TWO-YEAR-OLDS.  She goes to bed at 7.  We stretch that in order to maintain balance in our lives, but the truth is that I am in charge of caring for and nurturing a child who goes to bed at 7.

Officially I'm going to stop pretending I can help with things and be a normal person.  I'm saying too often, "I would love to help if you have any opportunities where I can bring my kids."  Or maybe:  I am a normal person.  Society should have room for all kinds of people.  Just because I can't help volunteer at a homeless shelter right now, it doesn't mean that I'm not doing my best to love my neighbor.  

This is a desperate public plea to all my friends to stay friends with me- even if I never invite you over and I have to say no to a million things.  Or you can come over if you like soup.  Because if we're ever going to invite friends over regularly again, we're going to have to go back to entertaining with soup and bread.

Chain Reaction of Mental Anguish

There might be nothing more optimistic than setting an alarm before you go to bed.  It's saying, "Yes, World, yes, New Day, I planning to get up early and greet you and your joys and challenges as my best self!"  It's especially optimistic for a night person, because as you're setting the alarm you've already stayed up too late.  And you're going to read before you turn out the light.  And maybe remember other things you have to do and get out of bed a few more times.

Then there's the cruel cycle of insomnia.  I'm up for hours in the middle of the night, so I can enjoy all my fears and worries magnified.  Last night I was literally going through Fraulein Maria's favorite things.  Whiskers on kittens, yes...girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes, how lovely...crisp apple strudel, mmmm, sure...the world's problems...crush it in my mind vice!  Just keep praying for sleep.  Then the next day of course I'm tired, so I drink more coffee, which means my sleep is bad again the next night.  Before you know it the cycle also includes standing in the express line at the grocery store with one item, a bottle of Pepto Bismol.

  

But hey, right now is mid-morning and the upward part of the cycle.   I've had my first coffees with a Pepto chaser.  The sun is out.  I'm dressed, and it's much easier to deal with problems in clothes and make-up than in pajamas and immense darkness.  I'm remembering my own favorite things, like Trent, Rush, Tate, Holly, whiskers on cats, the white dress with a blue satin sash I can make Holly for Easter, and the apple strudel that could theoretically be made with a box of puff pastry.  

I slept through my alarm to the last possible second, like I have every day of my life since I was a teenager, but I really think tomorrow might be the day I get up early.

Useful Things

On the pushy parent scale, with One being letting a kid wear a Halloween costume to church on Easter if that's what they want and Ten being forcing Holly into violin lessons right now and requiring two hours of practice a day, I'm trying to figure out where I would fall. Definitely not at either extreme- I'm hoping right in the middle?  It's all a balance of letting kids be free to be themselves while also teaching them how to be productive members of society.  I'd like to think that I let my kids choose their own activities and things they like to do, but then I also just realized that they're probably all going to have to try soccer and piano lessons.  They don't won't have to stick it out for years if they don't like it, but both are worth a try.

I volunteered for a shift at a pumpkin patch last week and as it was the middle of the day really early in pumpkin season, there was plenty of time to chat with my fellow worker.  We started talking about things that everyone who graduates from high school should be able to do, things that aren't necessarily taught in school.  The conversation started with how useful it would be if EVERYONE had a basic knowledge of all the major world religions.  That's Step 1 towards harmony in the world.

So here's the list we started with-

• swim
• cook 10 different meals (This is Jamie Oliver's thing and I think it's 10...some number of meals anyway.)
• ride a bike
• sew on a button
• basic carpentry, like using a screwdriver, hammer

What else?

In another conversation recently with friends, we discussed the challenges of learning an instrument as an adult.  You feel like because you're older you should be able to jump ahead.  "I mean, I'm 34 years old so I should be able to play the banjo!"  The reality is that you have to start at the beginning, just like every fourth grader with their first instrument.

There's just so much to learn!  Knowing how to play an instrument would be useful, but is not required.  Being kind, being brave,being generous please and thank you...nothing is more important.  But what are other concrete things to know?